You smile. But what is going on behind that smile? From a child we have been trained to grin and bear. Secrets never leave the home and hurts are not uttered past hidden whimpers. What have we done? What have our ancestor accomplished by allowing this cycle to be passed down from generation to generation? We have breed and raised “Silent Sufferers”.
It has become a new normal to suffer in silence. We feel accomplished because we appease our followers with the false grandeur of an elevated lifestyle. When, in actuality, we cry ourselves to sleep because our lives are harder than we dare admit to. Money does not equate to happiness. Yes, money pays the bills, but money does not offer emotional relief outside of financial stability.
“Instead of vocalizing how we are feeling and being true to self, most people have found a safe haven in creating two worlds. One world is open to the public which portrays partial truths and the other world is hidden in a secret dark place which holds their actual reality. What would ever happen if both worlds were combined?”
Indulge me for a second. I grew up in rather meager conditions. I suffered physical, emotional and sexual abuse at a very young age. Since I had no one to talk to about it I found myself creating coping mechanisms to endure each day. Eventually, I created a place I would escape to whenever a situation became too much for me to mentally or emotionally deal with. I would block out everything and escape to my new reality, a world where I was free, safe and happy. Whatever was going on with me in the other world I was oblivious too because mentally I was not there.
As I got older I carried on this behavior when it came to anything that I could not manage emotionally or physically. I was not very fond of expressing what was really going on with me so I presented a superficial version of myself to my companions. This lasted for years and instead of getting the help I needed I chose to suffer in silence. This is where a lot of you are. You are choosing to suffer in silence rather than to confront your demons head on.
After a while I got tired of suffering. I had a voice and I wanted to use it and one day, in a very defining moment, I combined both worlds into one. Talk about culture shock. I had nowhere to run and hide when I couldn’t cope. I was FORCED to confront my issues and seek the necessary help that I needed. I realized that I no longer had to suffer in silence.
“Now, wisdom is to not DISCLOSE all your business to just anyone, but maturity is to recognize destructive behavior and make the needed changes.”
I had a quick bout in therapy which really opened my eyes to the root of my issues. I gave myself the permission to live life with my new found voice. To no longer suffer in silence but to seek ways to thrive in the influence of the new power I had discovered. I no longer had to front for the gram. My voice gave a platform for other voices. Sometimes it takes one for the masses to be freed.
My freedom gave others the keys to unlock their chains as well. No, everyday will not be perfect… No, everyday will not be amazing… But yes everyday is a new opportunity to build, grow and develop a new perspective. So instead of suffering in silence choose to be an influencer. Use your voice to unlock the bondages that have been passed down from generation to generation. Don’t just cope, choose to conquer. Eliminate the dark places that hold secrets and promote chains. Be the light and shine your light.
Be determined to smile from your heart and not just your façade. For the things you cannot control release them to the best of your ability and begin to create a new wave for yourself. This wave will carry you through the tides and land you standing on solid ground.